UGHGHJDFJHSFBRGHHHHHH I AM SO FUCKING TIRED that i dont even know what to do but make a tumblr post. honestly.
the best thing to happen to me this week was me going to upstate. i legitimately wanted to cry tears of joy when i realized i could go. if it’s possible to love a place, i love that place completely. it is honestly the only place where i can spend not doing anything, not thinking about anything, it’s all mine. just me. and my thoughts. just kidding. no thoughts; just me. I have never been so confused and tired before, everything just seems to feel like a whirlpool and I am so tired. i feel like im wasting my time on something that means literally the world to me. it means everything to me. and i can’t stop thinking of it, dont wanna stop, etc. upstate, all i did was swim, row boats, run, take walks. it was amazing, cleansing, (any other adjective i can use to make it sound like a frickin getaway to the caribbean). If someone came up to me and asked if I wanna live there, it would be quite a choice.